A thing no one told me.

Everyone tells you not to wear white as a new mom, and I guess that's true. I don't wear much white myself, so I can't actually tell you if this is good advice or not. It's simply a good rule of thumb for me because I am clumsy and spill-prone, and it's just not flattering besides.

Because of this, I (stupidly) assumed that the new mom go-to color is black. Well, wrong again. I do wear a lot of black - perhaps as a nod to my overly dramatic days as a teenaged mall goth. I have learned very quickly that nothing accents a spit-up trail quite as well as black. It never fails, either. Ruby could go a whole week without spitting up, then I wear a black sweater and splat! Perhaps I should encourage her to leave a few more splats in random places so my sweater looks like it was tie-dyed by a drunk person.

The best option, and no one ever told me this, is to go for patterns. They conceal splats better, sometimes even making them look purposeful! Granted, you'll still carry the faint musk of regurgitated formula with you all day, but it's better than looking like you've been crawling through a sewer.

So, I've written an entire post about baby shampoo and now one that is more or less about baby puke. AWESOME. I vaguely remember what it was like to go places ...